May Day! May Day! Six weeks of cinematic pseudo-sincerity! This May Day comes Attack of the Killer B-Movies, a trio of deadly B-movies at their biggest, baddest and most brilliant! For two weekends each, horror classics The Birds, The Bad Seed and The Blob, are brought to life by an intrepid acting ensemble, and expertly adapted into a ‘streamlined stage format’ by SF playwright Sean Owens. Two weekends each—and all three deftly handled by a fearless stable of actors. Another Dark Room classic, to be talked about for years to come!
Equal parts camp and cunning, each of these film classics exudes mischievous excess, as well as astute insights on the taboos and terrors of its era, balancing the satiric with the sensational, the cliché and the clever.
Beginning with the Hitchcock classic, THE BIRDS (May 1-10), this ominous tale of avian invasion ripples with undercurrents of feminism, as willful gadabout Meanie Daniels pursues a ‘lovebird’ relationship with enterprising lawyer Mitch Brenner, while the quiet town of Bodega Bay takes notice. It’s Mitch’s mother, Lydia who rules the roost—but before feathers can fly, an aerial assault pits the hapless household against a squadron of starlings. Michelle Talgarow directs.
Next, Maxwell Anderson’s cult classic THE BAD SEED (May 15-24) gets the spanking it deserves. Devoted mother Christine Penmark seems powerless against the looming figure of her 10-year old daughter Rhoda. When a classmate drowns and his penmanship medal disappears, it’s impossible for anyone—including a criminologist, a mystery writer and a Freud-fixated neighbor—to believe that Rhoda’s polished smile may be seething with moral decay. Jim Fourniadis directs.
Finally, it takes a ragtag team of scofflaws to alert their sleepy town to the slimey dangers that a fallen meteor has unleashed. Brooding teen Steve Andrews interrupts a hit date with good girl Janie Johnson to chase the oozing, formless horror that’s gobbling up the community in THE BLOB (May 29-June 7). Sean Owens directs.
Don't believe us? Watch the trailer! (They never lie.)
Tickets: $20 at the door, or
$15 at brownpapertickets.com:
Thursdays, Fridays and Saturdays May 1 – June 7, 2008 8pm
Sex Appeal: Doo Doo & Buttholes
Comedy duo Sex Appeal (Justin Lamb and Jay Starr) return to the Dark
Room to host an evening of stand-up with some of their favorite local
comedians, including Beata Bakhtiari, Sean Keane, Brendan Lynch, and
headliner Sammy Wegent (Winner - 2005 Battle of the Bay). There will
be stand up, beer (BYO), strip club critiques, and most likely some
arguments about Iron Man.
Things We Made offers an atmosphere to share unconventional creations.
Patrick Bulger and Jesse Fernandez, a comedy duo from space, present
thought-provoking pieces about anything from gangster rap to starfish
safety. Paul Marino brings to the stage a salad of wit, characters,
illustrations, movement, music, and even magic (illusion) from space.
The savory music of DJ Real is glazed by his passionate dance, and
broken up with one-man, tech-savvy skits and corny jokes from space.
To see video from previous shows check out thingswemade.com, a
website from space!
Tickets: $10 at the door
Third Saturday of Every Month 8pm
The Monsters of Podcasting
The Monsters of Podcasting are the podcasting industry's first, best
and handsomest national touring group. See podcasting magic created
live before your very eyes. Laugh, cry and feel indifferent to the
most amazing podcasting tapings available for human consumption.
Featuring "You Look Nice Today: A Journal of Emotional Hygiene," with
Merlin Mann, Scott Simpson and Adam Lisagor. Plus Jordan, Jesse Go!,
featuring Jordan Morris (Fuel TV) and Jesse Thorn (Public Radio
International's The Sound of Young America).
Saturday, June 28 10pm
Michael Capozzola's Cheap City...The Show
The S.F. Chronicle carries Michael Capozzola's cartoon Cheap City every week. The show and the cartoon includes creative problem solving for social ills and cheap solutions and quick fixes for life and city living. And who can't use that these days...? For more information, go to www.capozzola.com.
Tickets: $10 at the door
Thursday, July 17 8pm
Every
Sunday 8PM $5
In the tradition of Mystery Science Theater 3000, except you can't tell which ones are the robots. — David Manning
Cinema is our culture's dominant art form.
They hold up a mirror to who we are.
They reflect our society, our dreams, our hopes, our fears.
Our films are how future generations are going to judge us.
Unfortunately, most of them suck.
Ever notice how you can't walk down the street or open a magazine or stand in line at a store or simply exist without ads for some dumbass multi-zillion dollar movie
being shoved down your throat?
And then they expect you to pay fifteen dollars to see it in some googolplex, and after sitting through a half hour of commercials? Or watch it on DVD and have to sit through even more commercials and anti-piracy ads that you can't skip past? Doesn't it all just piss you off?
If so—or if you just like to have a good time—then Bad Movie Night is for you.
Laugh with the hosts riffing on the movie. Yell your own comments. Try to figure out what the hell "Skull Films!" means. Help yourself to the free popcorn. Enjoy the intoxicating, brown-bagged beverage of your choice purchased from the store across the street. (Don't worry if the guy behind the counter glares at you. He does that to everyone.)
There. The ordeal known as Daddy Day Camp is behind us.
We can now take comfort in the fact that the movies can only get less painful from here.
Like this week's feature, which stars Adam Sandler as a guy who pretends to be gay and become domestic partners with his best friend so that...
No. No. Can't go on.
I mean...it's just...ow. Ow.
Make it stop. Please.
Your hosts Sherilyn Connelly, Mike Spiegelman and Mikl-Em will annul this terrible movie.
Upcoming Phlegms:
May 25, 2008
Norbit
Eddie Murphy plays multiple roles in a movie so foul, we may never do Razzie Month again.
Fat-suited pandemonium reigns.
Razzies won: Worst Supporting Actor, Supporting Actress, Actor (all Eddie Murphy)
Hosts:
Jim Fourniadis, Phil Darnowsky, Jerome Skaggs and other doomed souls.
June 1, 2008
Maximum Overdrive In the first and last movie directed by Stephen King, machines come to life and out-act the human cast. King himself calls it a "moron movie," which is why we love him.
Estevezian wackiness ensues.
Hosts:
Sherilyn Connelly, Rimma Dreyband, David Capurro and other meat puppets.
June 8, 2008
Thinner Based on a book written by King's alter-ego Richard Bachman, a fatty full-figured gentleman cursed by a gypsy begins to waste away. Kinda like your brain as you watch this movie.
Doublechinned pandemonium reigns.
Hosts:
Jim Fourniadis, Alexia Staniotes, Sam Shaw and other dark halves.
June 15, 2008 Special Event (that's why it's in a box):
Rhiannon and Sherilyn's Back to the Future Trilogy Birthday Sleepover!
To celebrate Rhiannon and Sherilyn's birthday(s), we're going to riff on all three Back to the Future movies. But you probably figured that one out yourself. Bring your jammies and blankets and get cozy. Necking with the birthday girls encouraged.
1.21 gigawatts of wackiness will ensue.
June 22, 2008
Children of the Corn Sarah Connor and the stubbly guy from Thirtysomething who was married to Michelle Pfeiffer (seriously, what was up with that?) happen upon a town where a little boy with a big hat leads a cult of children with smaller hats.
Rows of wackiness ensue.
Hosts:
Sherilyn Connelly, Jerome Skaggs, A.J. Solis and other cornballers.
June 29, 2008
The Dark Half Timothy Hutton plays a Stephen King-esque novelist who kills off his Richard Bachman-esque alter-ego, who then comes to life and kills people for real. Makes ya think, huh? Yeah, us either.
Pandemonium (which is an alias for wackiness) reigns.
Hosts:
Jim Fourniadis, Alexia Staniotes and other schizoids.
July 6, 2008
Godzilla (1998)
Godzilla (but not really) rampages through New York (sorta), and only Ferris Bueller can save the day (for want of a better way to put it).
Poorly remade wackiness ensues.
Hosts:
Sherilyn Connelly, John Harrison, Rimma Dreyband and other gorilla whales.
July 13, 2008
Reign of Fire
Batman and Wooderson hold a "Who's Scruffier?" contest while dragons burn shit up.
Fiery pandemonium reigns. (Oh, be quiet. You'd make the same joke and you know it.)
Hosts:
Jim Fourniadis, Sherilyn Connelly, Justin Lamb, Jay Starr and other piles of ash.
July 20, 2008
Cloverfield
Annoying New York hipsters shakeycam a monster invasion which makes you pine for the understated artistry of The Blair Witch Project.
Viral wackiness ensues.
Hosts:
Sherilyn Connelly, Jim Fourniadis, Gerri Lawlor and other annoying San Francisco hipsters.
July 27, 2008
Dragon Wars
The guy from Roswell loses the scruffiness contest while dragons battle an incomprehensible script.
Scaly pandemonium reigns.
Hosts:
Jim Fourniadis, Ray Zegri, David McComber and other himbos.
August 3, 2008
Hudson Hawk
Bruce Willis's ego costs $65M and grosses $17M. In 1991 dollars, no less.
Smirky wackiness ensues.
Hosts:
Sherilyn Connelly, Mike Spiegelman, Damien Chacona, Andy Wegner and other moonlighters.
August 10, 2008
Waterworld
Kevin Costner's ego costs $175M and grosses $88M. (Domestically. Yes, we know that with foreign and ancillary markets, the movie eventually recouped its costs. That's not the point.)
Pandemonium's hairline recedes.
Hosts:
Jim Fourniadis, Sherilyn Connelly, A.J. Solis other pee-drinking fish-people.
August 17, 2008
Leonard Part 6
Nobody knows how much Bill Cosby's ego costs, but it only grosses $4.6M. Which ain't much, even in 1986.
Wackiness (which goes great with Jell-O Pudding Pops!) ensues.
Hosts:
Sherilyn Connelly, Mike Spiegelman and other mushmouths.
August 24, 2008
Last Action Hero
The Governator's ego costs $85M and grosses $50M.
Pumped-up pandemonium reigns (again).
Hosts:
Jim Fourniadis, Sherilyn Connelly other hummers.
The itty-bitty Bad Movie Night Archive links: 2008 | 2007 | 2005-2006
Hey
People!! New designs just in time to totally miss the holidays!!
Visit
either our Dark Room
store or our new Maggie
store and buy our shirts and tiles. They woulda made a great
Holiday gift!!!
